You want to help a teenager? Hear it

One of the biggest mysteries in the relationship between parents and adolescents: who is busy and the child, when he is not with us? Sometimes we are very interesting. Sometimes we would prefer nothing about it know. Children and adolescent psychologist Lawrence Cohen states: “In the life of the child, as in any other, there are both good and bad. Parents can not always help the child. But support, give strength – can “.

Psychologists asked the children: “How adults can help you in your relationships with your friends?” The answer was discouraging. “Certainly not.” But when asked, “What have you ever helped the adults?” – The answer was quite different. “I heard.”

Once scientists recommend listening to, let us listen. But how to push children to a frank discussion about their lives and about their friends?

Parents and teens how to speak and how to listen to the child

The conversation with the younger pupils Lawrence Cohen proposes to start with the most common questions: What are addicted to your friends? How much do you have to fool around and play together? Is not there someone with whom you do not want to play? “Asking the child about friends, not about himself, you let him talk about his situation and his school life, without turning the conversation into an interrogation.

Teens 10-15 years experience strong demand for “team spirit”, belonging to any group. On the other hand, they often experience a sense of rejection and loneliness: “No one wants to be friends with me – and do not need me, and one bad.”

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